It was also my 2nd day on my increased dose. I didn’t do much that required concentration today, so I can’t make much of an assessment for myself. Basically I only took down the Christmas tree, cleaned the kitchen some, watched a movie with the family, cleaned the play room & the girls’ bedroom & closet.

I also started my increased dosage today. I didn’t really notice a difference. But, then again, I wasn’t really doing much of anything today.

I haven’t been taking my Adderall as consistently as I should. If I know I’m not going to be working, I often won’t take it, or I’ll only take it in the morning and not take my afternoon dose.  I also need to start journaling my symptoms better, even on the days I don’t take it, so I can get a better view of what the meds seem to be helping and what I need to be working on.

Like I said in a previous post, I am noticing a difference in my mental focus when I take it, as well as my fidgeting and my desire to do things “in a hurry”. I also had lunch and spent the afternoon with a friend today and helped her with a few things at her office. Partway through our time together I could feel my meds wearing off, but wanted to wait a little while until I took my 2nd dose of the day. I could feel myself getting a little more fidgety and noticed I was talking faster. When we sat down to lunch I took my meds and about 10 minutes later I started feeling “normal” again. I found myself speaking slower without having to think about it and not feeling the need to tear the straw wrapper into hundreds of little pieces (one of my fidgety habits). Something that totally took me by surprise was when my friend told me she was amazed to see how quickly it “changed” me. She said one thing she noticed right away after it “kicked in” was I finished sentences instead of jumping to another thought in the middle of the sentence. I didn’t even realize I did that!

So, after much thought and consideration I decided to get Brianna evaluated also since she is almost a mirror image of myself when I was her age. I do not want her to have to struggle with focus and studying like I did in school. Although I was on the honor roll, studying was almost painful for me. I scheduled a meeting with her teacher and we discussed a few things before I made her appointment.

Brianna was in rare form the day we went to the doctor (which was combined with my monthly check in). The child did not sit still the entire time we were in with the doctor. She was constantly walking around the room putting her hands on pretty much everything. I tried, in vain, to tell her to sit still, stay in one place, stop touching everything, etc. The doc said based on what I had told him about her at home and at school and “just being in the same room with her” (yep, his words), it was one of the easiest AD/HD diagnoses he’s had in a long time. So, we’re starting her on a light dose of Adderall twice a day. I’ll have to get all the paperwork done for her school so they can give her 2nd dose to her at school.

We’ve had a pretty good Christmas here in the household. We got a Wii! It’s GREAT! We’re having a great time playing games with each other. Even Delaney is able to play some of the games. JR’s enjoying it more that I thought he would. I’m much more SORE than I thought I’d be! That darn thing works muscles you forgot you had with some of those games…especially the ones you use the balance board for. I did all the yoga poses the other night just to try them all out…I could definitely feel it the next day!

Jackie and Shiner are doing great. They’re pretty much inseparable now. Shiner actually enjoys being around her. Jackie’s getting so big…she’s up to 30 pounds now. When the two of them get to running around the living room chasing each other it’s like a herd of buffaloes running through the house. Jackie’s gotten “sit” down pat and she’s pretty good at “stay”, so we’ve moved on to trying to teach her “down”.

The sweating seemed to subside later by early afternoon, so it wasn’t so bad. I’ll update again tomorrow when I’ve had a full day’s worth of meds. Plus, I’m seeing my therapist tomorrow.

Now, for the bad things…I do not feel hot at all, but O.M.G. the SWEATING! I had to change my shirt a little while ago!

I’d been seeing a psychologist for a couple of weeks when some issues came up and he asked me if I had ever been tested for Attention Deficit Disorder. I had not, but I’d often wondered if I had it. So, last week I got tested for and diagnosed with ADD, both hyperactive and inattentive types. I’m 36 years old. I thought it was something kids had and “outgrew”.

It was somewhat of a relief to actually have an official diagnosis. But, at the same time I was also feeling scared, angry and sad. Scared because I wasn’t sure how to proceed. Angry because I wasn’t diagnosed earlier. Sad because I began to wonder what “could have been” had I been diagnosed and treated as a child.

So, I did my googling that afternoon and found several web sites with information about ADHD in kids and adults. I did not realize that the symptoms showed up differently in girls and boys and adults! Almost every symptom listed for girls I had as a child! If we knew then what we know now, I might have been diagnosed and treated sooner. I was a very good student in school (honor roll & graduated high school with honors), but I struggled with studying and completing assignments. I wonder how much better I could have done if I could have been able to focus more. When I started to think about it I started to cry…hard. I didn’t let myself wallow in it too much though, because honestly, it didn’t do any good. It was “cleansing” to get it out, but time to move on.

The question now turns to what am I going to do NOW to “fix” this.

I had an appointment with my primary care doc today (he got a copy of the test results and letter from my psychologist), and he prescribed Adderall. I’ll pick it up from the pharmacy tomorrow (there was a long wait this evening and I needed to get home before J.R. left for work), so I haven’t started taking it yet. I’ve got another appointment with my psychologist later this week.

I’m going to try to start journaling here to help me keep track of how I’m feeling and if the meds are doing me any good, making me feel bad, having side effects, etc.

Stay tuned.

Well, it looks like I can add photos from my iPod, but they are added to the bottom of the post by default & I can format text using HTML coding, italics, did bold in the other paragraph, & I’m sure I could do colors & other formatting manually also, but that is a pain to do when you have to type with your thumbs. Oh well, it seems like it would be a great app for people who blog shorter blog posts on the go, but, as you can tell by the massive amount of posts on my blog , I’m not sure how much use I will get out of this app. But I do see a use for it for many people.

If this post turns out right, hopefully I will have moved the picture that is automatically inserted at the bottom in between two of these paragraphs.